Relationship and Love; the two terms which are used by many but understood by some.
For some, love and relationship are interlinked to each other, for some they both are completely interdependent, and for some these, terms have different meanings according to time, person and situation.
Some believe that they can be in a relationship only if they’re in love and according to some, it’s not really necessary to be in love to sustain a relationship.
So what do you believe in?
And before that, what according to you love is but?
Is it a formal expression that you just need to say because you’re in a relationship with someone or is it the feeling of heart that gets expressed only when it is felt?
Well, practically love doesn’t have any particular definition per se. It differs from individual to individual, from situation to situation.
It’s more of a feeling, especially for the ones who are in a relationship. So no, love can’t be defined. What is love for you may not be for me. So you can’t really tell by observing mere traits that a person is in love or not.
Now when you say that those guys are in a relationship doesn’t always mean that those guys are in love.
At present times being in a relationship; that is having a girlfriend or a boyfriend, and to be in love, are two different things.
You can be in a relationship when you’re attracted to a person and the person’s attracted to you too. When you both like each other and want to know each other more and are willing to share each other’s experiences. And if you match with each other’s vibes, you might fall in love also.
Now, this doesn’t mean that you can’t fall in love with her before getting into a relationship. You definitely can. No one can have control over that feeling. But that’s a completely different situation which we’ll discuss some other time.
Right now the point is, once you get into a relationship because you were really attracted to her, and now you really like her or even more than that and want to take your relationship from that like to love phase but don’t know exactly how to go ahead?
Well, this can be a little tricky because you don’t know where she’s standing and expressing your love without knowing that just increases your responsibility because then, you need to express her in the way that she understands, respects and at least start considering whether she would like to go on that road with you or not.
So here are some effective tips for you that will definitely help you.
#1 Start being open about love: Maybe you’ve been in a relationship with her for a long time now, but you may not talk about love and what are your thoughts and opinions about it, and what your partner’s?
You need to open about love in the sense that you need to make a comfortable environment where you two can talk to each other about your feelings and can share whatever seems to be fair.
Start talking about long-term relationships. You need not hurry and straightforwardly say that you feel like this and this, no.
Take a step at a time.
You can go like, “Hey honey, you heard about that couple? They celebrated their 5th anniversary today. You know I just love the fact how people spend time together and move ahead in life together with the same person for the longest they can. Isn’t that beautiful?”
Just like this little by little make her realize that you’re into love and long-term stuff.
#2 Show your care and effort: No matter how much you think about her, how much you care for her, until and unless you show that care, it’s all useless.
Guys usually do this thing that they care a lot about their girl but always step back to show it to her, to make her feel that care and those efforts. Well, that’s something you need to stop continuing if you do so because your girl deserves to feel every ounce of care that you just keep in your heart.
If you want to make her feel loved, you need to make her feel cared for first.
Once she’ll know that this person is right for me because I feel safe and confident with him, everything will fall right into place.
#3 Make her feel that she matters and she’s special: Caring is a different thing and making her realize that she matters is different.
When you’ll give your time, your respect and when your heart will say that she’s special, then that’s nothing but love. And to experience the same from her end, you need to show it.
Tell her at moments, that she’s beautiful, that she’s perfect, and that you’re lucky to have her. There’s nothing better than random compliments.
#4 Make memories: If you want to bring love into your relationship, start spending quality time with her.
No matter for how long you guys meet each other but make sure to make that count. Make sure to make memories.
Create memories to hold onto. Be genuine and be you. Be present with her both emotionally and physically. Show her that you adore her in every way.
#5 Take care of the trust: In a relationship, trust is like that important pillar, without which the relationship will first weaken and will eventually go down once the pillar’s damaged.
You need to have full faith in your partner and should demand the same from her end because without faith and trust no relationship has ever lasted.
#6 Don’t get too overprotected: This usually happens, that once you start to care for someone too deeply, you think about them a lot and also get overprotected at times.
Getting overprotected sometimes is fine but to be that way all the time can ruin things.
You need to give your partner some space. Being around them all the time can piss them off and it can affect your relationship badly.
There should always be some ‘me’ time in both of yours schedule.
Let her do what she wants to and let her know that being in a relationship doesn’t mean that she needs to be dependent on anyone or she’s bounded to do anything. No, that should never be the case.
You can never bring love into your relationship when your partner for even once feels like that they’re caged. So you need to give her space and if you’ll trust her, then there would be just protection, not overprotection.
#7 Only say ‘I Love You’ when you mean it: ‘I Love You’ should never-ever be said just to stay in the relationship, or just to make her feel better.
These words should never come from your mouth until you really mean them.
Some people just say that they love the person without knowing that they’re only attracted to them and that does not love.
Some people wait their whole life to feel loved and to say these words to them for whom they really feel so. So never just casually say these until you really mean it.
Even you can express your love without saying I love you using all the above points, in the situation when you’ve just started to feel so and you’re not so sure about it.
Because once you say it out loud, you just make the person feel that they’ve become a really important part of your life. So make sure that happens, when that’s really what you are feeling and want to convey.
It’s not tough to bring love into a relationship and once you’ve gone through these points, not only you will be able to do it but will also be successful in making your partner get aware of their feeling.
And if you guys find yourself to be on the same page then, voila!
All set then.
For more such love-related and dating-related content for men, you can also check out my book Lead Your Love on Amazon.